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July 15, 2010 / multiplesclerosis1209

Another Bladder Infection

Just when I think I’d start to feel better the fatigue and weak legs come back with a vengeance.  When my body is fighting an infection, it cause my symptoms to be really bad.  I went to a doctor today, peed in a cup and got some Cipro.  Hopefully within the next 48 hours I start to feel slightly better.  I’m getting reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally tired of this.  I’m thinking that I may call the doctor and get another week of medical leave so my boss can’t fire me for another week and maybe I can go to Unemployment and file for lack of hours or something.

This roller coaster is a fucking nightmare.  I can’t handle any sort of upset or change of plans without wanting to just cry.  I’m worried that I’m going to burn through all of Hubby’s sympathy in our first year married so I’m hiding some emotional pain or crying while I’m home alone.  Stupid, I know, because I know he only wants to help, but I’d like to pretend a few hours a day that our life is nearly normal.  Today after the doctor I went grocery shopping, which exhausted me, then came home, unloaded groceries, took a break then started cooking dinner.  I get such joy out of doing domestic Wifey things like getting Hubby’s favorite strawberry jam at the store and cooking him enchiladas for dinner.  I had to take several breaks during enchilada preparation but dag nabbit they are ready to go into the oven!  Now I’m too exhausted to even take a shower before he gets home but I probably will try anyway because I want to be “normal” and not fucking sick and pretend that everything is ok for just a few hours.   I pretend everything is ok and then BLAMMO! I break down and start crying and Hubby is totally confused.  He’s putting in a ridiculously long day today and the last thing I want is for him to have to do ANYTHING when he gets home from work but I am going to require help to finish dinner…..ugh.

Screw the shower.  I’m taking a nap.

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