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September 7, 2010 / multiplesclerosis1209

Wedding, Honeymoon and MS

What a whirlwind of a few weeks….where do I even begin?

The weekend before our wedding, Hubby’s parents came for a visit to help with last minute wedding stuff.  We decided to let them in on the little secret that we had been married since June.  We showed them pictures and they took it well.  We’re not telling people for a couple of reasons.  One, we want it to be our special little secret anniversary and two, people are going to react in several different ways.  Will they be hurt that they were not included?  Will they be mad because they went to an extra effort to make it to our wedding when in was just a “fake”?  Will they be happy for us?  Will they not care?   We asked them not to tell anyone but if it slipped out after the wedding, no big deal.  Well, the morning after the wedding Hubby’s mom decided to announce it to about eight members of her family.  We have yet to have any repercussions but I can’t wait to hear what everyone has to say and how many people know now.  We were both pretty pissed off about the whole thing.  So much for our special little secret….

The Wedding:

We had a HUGE party of a wedding and everything went amazingly well.  Folks were invited to come and stay with us for the entire weekend or just come for the ceremony and dinner.  With the number of people who showed up for the entire weekend, we had very few problems.  One of my Bridesmaids forgot her dress and one of the Groomsmen bought the wrong shoes but these problems were easy to fix.  We went shopping for a new dress and Hubby wore the wrong colored shoes so all of the Groomsmen still matched each other.  Our ceremony ended up WAY shorter than expected which was nice so that I didn’t have to be on my feet too long.  I got to see so many friends that I hadn’t seen in a long, long time and it was an amazing weekend but a long one.

We arrived Thursday afternoon to set up.  Hubby doesn’t let me do much labor or helping so I got to hang out with my BFF who came early.  Friday, all the rentals showed up so more set up.  Again, Hubby didn’t me help so I relaxed.  By Friday afternoon, guests started to arrive so I was up greeting people and schmoozing.  I was pretty exhausted by Friday night.  The camper trailer we were sleeping in for the weekend was freezing cold when we went to bed and the heater wasn’t working.  I didn’t sleep very well and was worried it might affect how I made it through the weekend.

Saturday was a little more hectic since it was the big day.  I had to figure out logistics to get all my girls showered and ready for the wedding and I had to get ready myself.  We went for pedicures then came home to get ready.  Again, everything went amazingly well.  We had a sunset ceremony and everything was perfect.  I spent as much time as I could off of my feet and away from people during the day so the evening/night was much easier.

The Honeymoon:

Oh the “honeymoon”.  After our first date, Hubby bought tickets to an outdoor music festival that included camping for three nights.  Little did we know it would turn out to be our honeymoon.  Since we can’t afford a big fancy vacation right now, we called the concert weekend our honeymoon.  We shared a camp spot with two of our friends and boy was that a mistake.  These are Hubby’s friends originally and I’ve spent some time with them before.  They normally fight a lot but it is bearable.  This particular weekend, they fought the entire time.  John and Linda spent the entire weekend upset with each other.   I had never spent much time with either of them and don’t really know them very well.  I was done with John by Saturday morning.  He talks too much and it is impossible to have a conversation if he is anywhere near you.  He interrupts EVERYONE in whatever conversation is going on.  It was exhausting and I couldn’t compete with him.  If Hubby and I were off somewhere sitting and talking to each other, John would come over and dominate the conversation….this was how he was ALL WEEKEND with ALL conversations.   John had music playing, a generator running and would never shut up.  Having lesions on my brain, I sometime lack focus.  If there are too many things going on around me, my brain basically shuts down so I just kept quiet most of the weekend.

Another issue was getting to the concerts.  We had a shuttle that took us there but then we had to literally walk a mile to get to our seats.  Once we were at our seats, the toilets were far away up a steep hill.  We spotted some port o potties super close but they were restricted.  Hubby and I walked over to see what was up.  They were the Handicap toilets and also the spot where the handicap shuttle picked up and dropped off.  Hubby managed to get us wristbands so that we could use the toilets there AND use the handicap shuttle.  Boy did this save me.  We did less walking and I didn’t pee my pants at all.  It helped me relax about the whole thing.

The next night while on the Handicap shuttle, someone mentioned handicap seating.  I asked more about it and lo and behold, we got to sit in a roomy area not 10 yards from the handicap toilets!  My main annoyance with my MS is bladder control.  The seats were pretty darn good and I didn’t have drunk people bumping into me all night! We had had tickets for general admission and I was NOT looking forward to it.

The third night we had tickets for seats again.  We took the handicap shuttle, used the toilets then made our way to our seats which were all the way across the arena.  About 30 minutes into the concert, I had to pee again.  It was dark, loud and jam-packed with people.  I had Hubby escort me through the madness.  Once we got out of the crowd, Hubby asked if I was ok because I was holding onto him tighter than normal.  I didn’t realize how stressed out I was until he asked and I started crying.  We ended up sitting in the handicap area again.  I had a good little cry and then we cuddled and watched the rest of the concert.  From here on out, I will always look into handicap accommodations.

This was Hubby’s most favorite band ever and he still supported me in my needs by moving out of good seats, escorting me to the potty and leaving the concerts early so we could miss the crowds.  I am seriously the luckiest girl in the whole world.  Learning to live with MS is so hard and I am so glad that I have such an amazing partner through all of it.  It’s all a learning experience and Hubby is my angel who fell into my life just I needed him.  Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake.


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